Reflection Blog #10

• Which of the 5 protective factors were present in your childhood? Which of the 5 are present in your family today? How do you think they have helped you build resilience?

As I reflect on my childhood, all of the protective factors were present in my childhood.  I had a really good childhood that didn't have any major issues.  Whenever something would happen, my parents taught us to be resilient and seek counsel if we needed it.  We were connected in the community and at church so we had that support from many people in not only the peaks of our lives but also the valleys too.  My parents made our home a safe place for us where we could bring any issue to them.  They would provide emotional support for us.  My sisters and I didn't have to worry about not having a concrete support system like some of our peers.  My parents taught us how to regulate our emotions whenever we are feeling upset or angry.  Sure, there were times when we would lose our cool, but most of the time we could talk through why we are feeling upset or angry.

When I think about my family with my husband and sons, I think we have all of them covered.  Much like how I grew up, we have a stable home for our boys.  They know they can come to us with any issue they are having.  We want them to feel comfortable with us because if they didn't feel like they could talk to us then we would have some serious issues.  Sometimes, however, they don't because they might be scared of what we will say about whatever it is, but once they do, we reassure them that it's ok.  I think the strongest protective factor in our house is the one about knowledge of parenting and child development because I have taken so many classes now about it that I can understand what my children are feeling a lot better than my husband can.  Whenever any of my kids are upset, I can usually trace their feelings to a reason and justify that reasoning because I have learned a lot about child development whereas my husband doesn't really look at the reasoning.  Sometimes he just tells them to stop without wanting to know the reason of their tears and tantrums.

I think that both my childhood and my current family have helped me build resilience because no matter what happens in my life, good or bad, you have to get up and do better.  You have to learn hard lessons but you will be better for it at the end of it all.  Be open and honest with people you love and care for so you can work it all out.